


Pressure

by nothlits



Category: Persona 5
Genre: ADHD, Autistic Character, M/M, Sharing stims, Stimming, neurodivergence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-13 06:14:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18935080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nothlits/pseuds/nothlits
Summary: Weighted blankets are expensive. Boyfriends are free.





	Pressure

**Author's Note:**

> Ryuji and Yusuke are ADHD/Autistic solidarity.

“Ryuji,” Yusuke spoke up from his place on the floor, flat on his back, eyes focused on some spot on Ryuji's ceiling. Ryuji looked over from his spot on the bed, manga in hand. “Would you lay on me?” 

“Wow, bit forward, don't you think? You could at least take me to dinner first.” Ryuji grinned down at him, but Yusuke just looked at him blankly, innuendo going over his head as such things usually did. 

“You know I do not have any money. If I did, I would be happy to buy you dinner sometime as repayment for all you do for me.”

Yusuke had a way of being so genuinely and plainly kind that sometimes it made Ryuji feel bad for teasing him, even from a place of love. 

He fumbled a smile and got off the bed to kneel on the floor next to him. “None of that repayment shit. I keep tellin’ you, I do things cuz I care.” He hovered over Yusuke, who flipped over onto his stomach. “How do you want me?” 

“Horizontally. Like so,” Yusuke motioned side to side across his own back, then folded his arms under his head and rested his cheek on them. 

Ryuji positioned himself so he was laying on his stomach across Yusuke's back, legs on one side of him and arms and head on the other, putting weight across the middle of his spine. He heard Yusuke hum quietly. 

“Good?” Ryuji lowered his head to his own arms similarly to Yusuke's pose. He had his knees bent and feet in the air against his bed.

“Yes. Thank you.” 

The first time this had happened, it had been weird. Ryuji didn't understand what Yusuke was asking for, and he ended up getting nervous and making crude jokes and making him feel ashamed for having asked. A quiet talk later, and he had apologized and they had quite literally kissed and made up, but he still felt a pang of guilt each time he thought about it. 

Yusuke seemed so at peace during these moments. He may have often looked relaxed and even blissfully carefree to onlookers in his daily life, but Ryuji knew an oblivious-seeming demeanor didn't mean that Yusuke's brain wasn't near constantly in a state of overdrive, much like his own. Quiet moments laying on the floor might be the one thing keeping Yusuke from his brain boiling over at the edges for that day, and if that was the case then Ryuji was more than happy to indulge him. 

Ryuji had at first made the mistake as well of assuming that Yusuke was naive, slow, eccentric, but that hadn't been true at all the more he had given him time to open up. Yusuke was incredibly intelligent about a number of things Ryuji had never even considered. He was compassionate in his own ways. Though it took him a longer time than some to process information, it didn't make the end result less impactful. He was full of insight. In stark contrast with Ryuji, his brain ran faster than his mouth. 

Becoming closer also meant that Ryuji became very aware of all of the small affections Yusuke chose to bestow on him and him alone. Little unorthodox shows of love that Ryuji hadn't anticipated, that weren't shown in movies or talked about in any manga he had read. No one had told him about these sorts of things, but once he realized what they were, he had nearly been moved to tears.

Yusuke, usually slightly averse to touching, who ordinarily would tense up at a bump to his shoulder or someone touching his arm, who would anxiously scoot away from anything resembling a hug, had found comfort in contact with Ryuji. 

They were little touches at first, but they changed as Yusuke became comfortable. He would run his fingers over Ryuji's hands idly, feeling over his skin and the joints of his fingers. Ryuji would be sitting, watching something on his phone, and Yusuke's hands would be on the hem of his shirt, toying with the stitches and smoothing the fabric, eyes focused on the patterns. Yusuke would tap out intricate patterns on Ryuji's arm while they were pressed close on the train, other hand clutching Ryuji's tightly for security. Yusuke hadn't warmed up to such close prolonged contact to be willing to properly cuddle much, complaining about the overabundance of heat, but would lean on Ryuji, or drape his long legs over his lap, or simply hold onto an arm. 

One thing had become clear and it was that Yusuke viewed Ryuji as safe. And so they found themselves in situations like this, lying vulnerable on the floor of Ryuji's bedroom.

Ryuji's legs started a slow tap against his bed, one then the other, seeking the solidity and fluidity of the motion. He could see Yusuke's fingers tapping out the same rhythm on his own arm silently. He smiled.

“Hey,” He kept his voice down, cautious. Sometimes the floor time was a preventative to something worse, and he wasn't certain how close to worse Yusuke was feeling. “You good to talk?”

“Yes.” A single word answer, but he didn't sound agitated. 

“You feelin’ okay? Anxious?” 

“Yes, a bit. Your willingness to accommodate me does help tremendously.” Yusuke turned his head so he could look at Ryuji, opposite cheek resting on his arms now. “Are you sure this is not… making you uncomfortable? I know you expressed concern about this being strange in the past, and I cannot bear to even consider that my…” He trailed off, expression showing he was not finished, just thinking hard. Ryuji waited. “My unnecessary requests are burdening you.” 

Ryuji lowered his forehead to his arms and laughed quietly. “Nah, c'mon… You don't burden me, babe. This helps you. I wanna help.” He turned his head again to look at Yusuke, whose eyes were fixed on a spot across the room, unmoving. _Listening intently_ , Ryuji knew. His version of eye contact. “If me layin’ on the floor with you makes your day more bearable then why am I not gonna do that, y'know?” 

Yusuke's eyes shifted to a new spot and Ryuji halted his own thoughts, knowing Yusuke was piecing together a response and he shouldn't interrupt him. It had taken months of close examination of each other's conversational patterns, but he had eventually learned this. Interrupting Yusuke's processing caused undue stress and frustration from struggling to communicate and Ryuji could hold his tongue if it meant avoiding that.

Ryuji shut his eyes and waited. He felt Yusuke barely shift under him. 

“Could you move up a bit?” Yusuke tried to shift again, trapped under Ryuji's weight. Ryuji moved up closer to the top of his spine. “Yes, there. Thank you.” 

“Yeah, 'course.”

They fell silent again for another minute before Yusuke spoke again, quietly. “You truly make me feel... loved.” 

A big, stupid smile spread across Ryuji's face and he leaned over to kiss Yusuke's head before settling back where he wanted him. “Good, cuz I love the hell outta you.” 

“And I you, in less crass terms.” Yusuke smiled with his eyes shut and Ryuji's chest swarmed with butterflies at the sight. “You are a welcome weight tethering me to a sense of stability. Without your presence, I feel that I would be faring much less adequately. You have seen me on a bad day. I can only imagine that I would have many more of those without you. I have said it before, but I do often feel like I have been gifted a personal ray of sunshine in being allowed the pleasure of knowing you.” 

Ryuji was rendered speechless, a rare occurrence growing more frequent with Yusuke's endearingly poetic confessions of adoration. He just leaned his head over and rested it on Yusuke's. He felt him press back up against him, like a cat rubbing against a hand, complete with small nuzzle. Ryuji chuckled and stayed like that for some time until Yusuke lowered his head again, signaling wanting an end to that contact. He pressed another kiss to his head, then adjusted his positioning again.

His legs resumed their taps against the bed, slower this time, and he saw Yusuke's hand pick the rhythm back up. A happy motion, a comfort in picking up on Ryuji's personal beat and making it mutual. Yusuke had once described it as a sort of harmony of emotional output. 

Existing in perfect sync, however briefly.


End file.
